Recently an Orlando Sentinel article titled “Cracking down on pizza menus, other handbills distributed illegally at hotels” caught my eye. I found the story interesting because I have represented these supposedly rouge individuals who pass out flyers on private hotel properties. They are inevitably teenagers paid minimum wage to pass out flyers for some small, mom-and-pop pizza joint that is just trying to get a piece of the Disney pie.

It should be no surprise that “lobbyists for both the Central Florida Hotel & Lodging Association and Walt Disney World” supported the bill. As every dollar that is spent at a local small business is one less dollar going into their corporate profits (never mind that the small business charges less for a better and local product).

The story outlined a bill sponsored by Rep. Steve Crisafulli, R-Merritt Island which sought to increase the penalties for passing out flyers on hotel properties without permission. His purported reason for sponsoring the bill “arose out of complaints from Central Florida hoteliers that criminals are using bogus menus and coupons to trick tourists into handing over their credit-card numbers, to burglarize their unlocked hotel rooms or to steal peoples’ identities.”

As I am all for capitalism and public safety (both mine and tourists),  I said fair enough and figured I would read House Bill 63 myself to see how it alleviated this reprehensible handbill problem that is endangering the lives of citizens state wide.

Protecting Tourists or Corporate Profits?

The first thing that caught my eye was that the bill was titled the “Tourist Safety Act of 2011.” The only problem was that the bill does not mention the word tourist one more time in the entire text of the bill (or even the words traveler or visitor). Nor does the bill even create any new penalties if the victim was a tourist, or create any new crime for targeting a tourist. Strange I said, how can you have a Tourist Safety Act of 2011 without at least enacting something to make tourists safe.

Rather, the only notable changes to the previously enacted version of the bill is that it increases the fines that “must” be imposed to $1,000 on a first conviction, $2,000 in a second, and $3,000 in a third.

The kicker though is that upon a third conviction, law enforcement can seize “any” property that is involved in the nefarious handbill distribution racket. Really what it means is that Disney can try to get law enforcement to do their dirty work and seize  some mom-and-pop small business’s vehicle, printers, property to try and force them out of business for even daring to divert a dollar away from the Disney empire.

I could not imagine why any self respecting politician would file a bill titled “Tourist Safety Act” that has nothing to with tourist safety. But then I remembered that I am dealing with a politician whose primary donors are probably Disney and resort properties.

So if you are trying to get others to vote for a bill that does nothing but support corporate business interests, what better way to trick your fellow legislators into voting for a bill without actually reading it than to name it the “Tourist Safety Act of 2011” – I mean who would vote against Tourist Safety?

Handbills and Handguns?

But even more bizarre, Section 5 of the bill throws in some mumbo jumbo about protecting gun rights. What in the world does illegal handbill distribution have to do with the protection of gun ownership rights.

Section 5 reads. “This act does not affect or impede the provisions of s. 790.251, Florida Statutes, or any other protection or right guaranteed by the Second Amendment to the United States Constitution”

I think we all know that the Second Amendment of the United States Constitution protects the “right of the people to keep and bear arms.”

But many might not be familiar with F.S. 790.251, which is known as the “Preservation and Protection of the Right to Keep and Bear Arms in Motor Vehicles Act of 2008.” As you can imagine, the statute insures that not only can you keep an AK47 in your home, but also in your car while at work.

The addition of this language is concerning for no other reason that there is no logical purpose for its inclusion in the bill  unless you hope to show your “constituents” that while you believe that teenagers should be fined thousands of dollars for passing out pizza flyers, you also believe those same “criminals” should be able to bring their guns with them while they are doing so.

That does not promote Tourist Safety, it discourages it.

Nothing to do with Tourist Safety

Bottom line is that the “Tourist Safety Act of 2011” (Title of HB 63) has nothing to do with the safety of tourists.

Rather, its sole purpose and only affect will be to protect the most minuscule of corporate profits, punish local small businesses, and somehow insure that accused pizza flyer passer outer types do not lose their right to bear arms.

This bill is plain stupid.